David Rose has had quite the emotional journey on Schitt’s Creek — and that includes his relationships.
David is pansexual, which means, as David would say, he “likes the wine and not the label.” But since moving to the small town, he’s actually only had relationships with cisgender men and women.
Of course, we all know where David’s romantic journey ends up. And David and Patrick are pretty much the cutest couple on TV. But what about all the people he dated before he met Patrick?
Below you’ll find our rankings of David’s past relationships — well, those that we know of.
4. Sebastien Raine
This dude is pretty much the epitome of everything David’s life used to be before moving to Schitt’s Creek. He’s a sleazy charmer and a manipulator — he even tried to trick Moira into an embarrassing photoshoot.
Luckily David is a totally new person when he sees Sebastian (who, by the way, was the longest relationship he had before Patrick). He tells him off and even ends up bonding with his mom in the process.
Things were going so well until David realized he was inadvertently in a throuple with Stevie. Um, awkward! It all came to a head at that dinner where Jake decided the three of them come together in one relationship.
Honestly, I never liked Jake, even from the start. He was actually a bit like Sebastian — a total smooth talker. Luckily, David got out of that situation right in time. Stevie, on the other hand, just couldn’t walk away.
Let’s be real — David and Stevie’s “relationship” (or whatever it was) was a complete disaster. Their friends-with-benefits situation didn’t end well and David ended up completely ditching her and breaking her heart. Rude!
But the two were eventually able to patch things up and now the two are officially best friends. And, real talk, their friendship pretty much feels like fate.
I mean, was there ever any doubt that David and Patrick would come in at #1? The two are pretty much #RelationshipGoals.
Patrick has so much patience for David’s ridiculousness and has truly brought out a new, vulnerable side of David. David even said “I love you” for the first time ever. And as Patrick has said, Davis is truly “his Mariah Carey.” Could you ask for anything more.
Schitt’s Creek season 5 premieres on Pop TV on January 16, 2019.
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Photo: Schitt’s Creek / Pop TV
Lena Finkel is the Editor and Founder of Femestella. Prior to starting Femestella, she worked at People, InStyle, and Tiger Beat. Her favorite Housewife is Bethenny Frankel and when she’s not watching RHONY, you can probably find her obsessing over her tuxedo cat Tom or hoarding drugstore lipsticks.