[Trigger warning: This article contains descriptions of self-harm]
Demi Lovato recently opened up about why they often ditch fan meet-and-greets and the reason is hard to hear.
In a new interview with Paper magazine, Demi admitted that they find meeting their fans to be particularly draining, especially when they open up to them. They explained,
“It’s draining, yes, and it’s hard. There are reasons why my meet and greets have gotten a lot shorter over the years. More than a handful of people would tell you each time, ‘You saved my life,’ or they would show me the cuts on their wrists.”
“I know that they mean well, I know that they are confiding in me because they have no one else. But it does take a lot.”
Demi has worked hard to move past their history of self-harm. And while they’ve always been open about their history of cutting themself — something they find incredibly important — that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re ok seeing other people’s scars.
Demi was spotted with scars on their arms as early as 2008 (when they were 16). They didn’t end up going public with their history of cutting until 2011 in an interview with 20/20. They explained at the time,
“It was a way of expressing my own shame, of myself, on my own body… I was matching the inside to the outside. And there were some times where my emotions were just so built up, I didn’t know what to do. The only way that I could get instant gratification was through an immediate release on myself.”
They later expanded on their experience of self-harming while speaking with Self magazine a year later in 2012. They said,
“There were times I felt so anxious, almost like I was crawling out of my skin – that if I didn’t do something physical to match the way I felt inside, I would explode.”
“I cut myself to take my mind off that. I just didn’t care what happened. I had no fear.”
For many people with a history of cutting, seeing others with scars, cuts, and marks can be particularly triggering. However, triggers are different for every individual.
If you are currently hurting yourself or thinking of hurting yourself, reach out to the Crisis Text Hotline where you can text with a trained counselor.
Wondering what to expect when you reach out to a suicide hotline? Read one person’s first-hand account of what it’s like to be on the other end of the phone.
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Lena Finkel is the Editor and Founder of Femestella. Prior to starting Femestella, she worked at People, InStyle, and Tiger Beat. Her favorite Housewife is Bethenny Frankel and when she’s not watching RHONY, you can probably find her obsessing over her tuxedo cat Tom or hoarding drugstore lipsticks.